Power - An original

[lostdave]

Ok ....
here goes....
would like some feed back

MP3 zipped HERE (http://www.flatface.net/~theartisan/cgi-bin/IKB/ikonboard.cgi?;act=Attach;ID=53;f=17;t=2;p=1)
The change log is getting too hard to follow now.......

I listen to the first mixes I did of this song and It has evolved greatly...with a great amount of guidance from the members of this board :D



Dave

[lostdave]

Sheeesh......
Cmon' guys.......do I have to beg for some criticisim here????


Dave

[PatGuy]

Well done! Great singing voice, whoever she is! And a nice beat to boot! The only thing you might consider is a little more variety to the music.. that is, it seems to be the same loop over and over for a while at the beginning of the song. That said, I still love it, and will listen to it often, I'm sure. :)

Pat

[ZelRiptha]

I'll give it a listen and commentary, Dave. I might not finish it tonight, but no need to beg :).

[ZelRiptha]

I like the bass, nice drums.
Is there a soft synth sequence that enters at bar 4 with the bass, or is that just an artifact of the MP3 encoding? If it's a synth or organ or something, make it a bit louder, it's drowned out. Otherwise, nevermind :).
It may be my imagination, but it sounds to me like the solo guitar is a bit flat compared to the rest of the mix, mainly in the first solo. Also, the second solo has some growls in it that jump out of the mix (maybe intentional?).
Good vocal mixes and harmonies, nice panning of the back-up vocals.
Ending's a bit abrupt.
Nice overall, though.

[lostdave]

Thanx for the feedback guys.....

PAT and ZR,
yes there is a Hammond in that begining bit....I sorta rushed the line..stuffed it...and couldn't bothered going back to fix it....wasn't sure If I still wanted it there...I might redo it and try it again...

The growls in the last solo (ihad a better listen to it) is clipping!!!!! ARG!!!!!!

I used a different guitar for the Main solo.....intonation on it MAY be a bit out.....

the ORIGINAL OTIGINAL version had an extra verse and a bridge..I didn't like the bridge so that got chopped....didn't like th xtra verse....that got chopped..

The singer's name is Angie....Very very good(when I can get her on a good day)

How would you envisage the ending ZR?

[lostdave]

OK....slightly edited version....with an accoustic in the chorus.....

Will rework the keys intro and the solo tomorrow after I have created enuf room in my studio to swing a guitar :D


Dave

[ZelRiptha]

Originally posted by lostdave
Thanx for the feedback guys.....

PAT and ZR,
yes there is a Hammond in that begining bit....I sorta rushed the line..stuffed it...and couldn't bothered going back to fix it....wasn't sure If I still wanted it there...I might redo it and try it again...


Ah, I thought I wasn't imagining that... :)


How would you envisage the ending ZR?

Hmm, what I hear on relistening is that there is a fade on the guitar and organ(?) chord that is going out nicely, when chop - the sound drops completely. I think if the chord just faded into silence (1-2 more seconds), it would be perfect. That's what I meant by abrupt. Did that make sense?

[lostdave]

yup....I think you will find the new version has that fixededded..
:D

Dave

[ZelRiptha]

Yes! Much better :).

[theARTiSAN]

Power gets better and better!
I like the acoustic addition - really fills out the sound.
The solo guitar does seem to have lost a little of its edge compaired to previous mixes.
Also - I still can't get over the difference in the vocals since you've added the "swirlies" - excellent :thumbsup:

When's the mix with the reworked solo to be expected? Or is that pending resolution of 'the blender' problem?

[lostdave]

I should have the blender sorted out today so I will redo the solo tonite After work(i won't use the strat this time)

I still want to use a live bass on it....but I just haven't gotten around to borrowing a Bass yet to do it with....all in good time I guess ....MIDI bass will do for now ;)


Dave

[KingXII]

geeez you and art are like gods i think the world need more music like this lol.

[lostdave]

Hmmm...Thanx King.....
Trying to get the ear of the world is half the battle..........

I think Art and I need to do some collaberation

[ZelRiptha]

Originally posted by theARTISAN
...Also - I still can't get over the difference in the vocals since you've added the "swirlies" - excellent :thumbsup:...

"Swirlies"? Is that the back-ups moving from side to side (nice, BTW), or did I just miss an earlier mix?

[lostdave]

Art has been listening to this song for a bit longer than most....
IN fact I think he probably heard one of the first mixdowns I did of this song....

As I listen to it more..I get better Idea's Production wise. The panning on the backing vocals and the echo lines was done probably about 3-4 revisions ago..so Art probably missed a cpl...or didn't notice them as much....


Dave

[lostdave]

BTW guys....that vocal was a one take scratch vocal..I would like her to redo it...jsut iron out some of the Glaring work done by the autotune....but again...that's another day :D

Dave

[lostdave]

OKIDOKI!!!!!

This is the Latest version.....
Redid all the guitar solo's.....where there was a keys intro that is now a guitar intro

The middle solo hasn't changed alot..
the guitar Outro...NOW...at the moment there are 2 guitar tracks...one panned left and one panned right..
Have a listen to both of them and let me know which one sounds better.........

[ZelRiptha]

Great live drum sound.
Love the new guitar intro!
First solo - great sound. No intonation problems this time.
Second solo - good sound. I think I like the left one better, but they both serve well.

You're right that the vocal track can use some work, but it's a great first take.

I think when I'm listening to this in open air, I'm feeling overpowered by the bass and drums. It's not as noticeable in headphones. Having trouble making out lyrics this way, altering balance will probably fix that. (I think I have this problem a lot with my computer's stereo system - it may be bass heavy. Might want to verify that with someone else just in case.)

Hope this helps :).

[lostdave]

I checked it on the Sepctrum analyser and it looks ok....nothing out of the ordinary....and sounds ok on my Refference Monitors ...the only environment I Haven't cheked it in yet is the car....

That can be tommorrow's task on the way to work ;)

Thanx for the feedback ZR

On the last guitar solo I was thinking of maybe blending the two..I will fave a fiddle with it tonite and see how I get on.

Dave

[theARTiSAN]

Damn dialup... I'll have this soon... Can't wait to hear it!

Thanks King :thumbsup:
Dave's the God though... I don't even have a blender... :(
small inside joke

Dave - Did I hear someone mentioned collaborating?
Hellova fine idea if you ask me. I'm game.

[besty]

Only heard the first few bars so far but I like what I hear so far. Nice groove happening there! Looking forward to the rest of the song. I'm only on a bloody 56K connestion here. I think I better get cable!

[ZelRiptha]

Originally posted by lostdave
I checked it on the Sepctrum analyser and it looks ok....nothing out of the ordinary....and sounds ok on my Refference Monitors ...the only environment I Haven't cheked it in yet is the car....

That can be tommorrow's task on the way to work ;)

Thanx for the feedback ZR

On the last guitar solo I was thinking of maybe blending the two..I will fave a fiddle with it tonite and see how I get on.

Dave

No worries, then, I'm thinking it's my upstairs rig - too much bass. I'll fiddle the knobs a bit so I'll quit telling everyone their bass is overpowering :o .

Mixing the solos could be cool, might be tough to balance so they don't jar against one another, but I like the idea.

I do really like the track overall, and my wife keeps humming it, so it must be good ;).

[lostdave]

It was my first attempt @ super radio friendly......and it was also the first song I wrote on guitar...usually i Write sitting @ a piano...so this is a very different work for me.

Thanx for all the feedback guys.



Dave

[lostdave]

I have decided I Hate the sound of the drums......

they are the next thing to get changed...

Kick doesn't have enuf punch and the snare doesn't sound tight enuf.....

I hate over analysing my stuff
GRRRRRRRRRRRRR


Dave

[ZelRiptha]

You da boss. I like 'em pretty well already.

[lostdave]

I think I know how to fix it wthout redooing the whole drum thing again...........I will just gate the snare a bit get rid off that horrible SWISH I am gettin at the end....


I'm clever like that :D :D :hit:

Dave

[lostdave]

Made somne changes.....but did the mix with headphones on due the the early hour of the morning that it was.....then listend to it in the car on teh way to work...needs some fixing...

So I will do it again hopefully with better results.

Dave

BTW if anyone has the sonar 2.1 update that they would like to share with me.......drop me a line

[ZelRiptha]

Cool, looking forward to it! :)

Can you not D/L the 2.1 update if you already own 2.0?

[lostdave]

ummm...how does one answer that question tactfully........

ummm..it is only available for Registered Users of sonar.........

[ZelRiptha]

Heh! I thought that might be the case... ;) :nono:

[lostdave]

It's great software........Just not US$500 great!!!!
I would be happy to pay what it is worth........too many bugs to pay that mych....

But anyways....

Drums re-equed....guitars mixed and leveled.
all is sounding pretty sweet..if ya ask me...but your not....that's why I am asking you guys ;)


Dave

[ZelRiptha]

New version finished then?

[lostdave]

From a Mixing stand point ...YES...from a Vocal Standpoint...No.....

Still one more revision to go..but that won't be for about another week.

Dave

[ZelRiptha]

Great, looking forward to it! :)

[jeaniesing]

Okey Dokey...... My words of vacilliting wisdom....

You know its good music... or you wouldn't have gone through the trouble of getting the singer etc, etc..... Recognizing that and the talent behind the writer and singer I shall critique so long as you ignore anything I say that's unpleasant!!!

impressions.....
> I like the funk sound of intro.....
> Can you PM me/post the lyrics?... I can't understand some of 'em (prob my system)
> "A" section... Tempo/rate of words does not match active rhythm guitar.... ballad meets funk? Love the melody (very Sexy!) - Love the funk.... don't love them together.... more text? Less rhythm guitar? both are essential to piece.... maybe 2 pieces are born here ***
>2nd "intro" before repeat of "A" section... where'd that hot solo guitar go? liked that ;)
>solo guitar - heavy distortion in lower range sounds awfully muddy..... hmmm..... Idunno.... another voice maybe better? just not as hot as intro and coda....
> Kill the second set of "Yeah yeah's" ;), too trite
> After the guit. solo - Almost wanna hear B then A again (my fave part) then B with a B repeat/fade out behind guitar coda .... "BBcoda" gets repetitive and my attention wanders

***lotsa thoughts here.... singer is a siren and this suits her voice well... maybe terrific when live if she's making love to the mic - but suffers in recording. Maybe double up on the text rate in the "A" section and retain slower "B" section for contrast.... Or easier to back off of guitar - but its SUCH a hook at in the intro - it was the thing I loved immediately!

[lostdave]

Jeanie,

More Lyrics Is the Primary thing I am hearing here???Is that the Gist???

OK.....it used to go B A then we axed a verse....the song was getting too damn long..MY attention was starting to wander!!!

as for the loss of Repeat guitar solo.....welll...........I can only have so many Ideas Per song..I have to quota them out or they start sounding the same ;) at least to my ears...

The Vocals are being re-recorded this week...so I will have a play with the structure and release "power(jeanisings remix) ;)

Thanx for your ideas thoughts and suggestions......everyone else focuses on the Music but you look @ the interaction of the two...(which I admit is usually secondary for my ears....Hey ...I'm a guy....we don't listen to lyrics :D )



Dave

[jeaniesing]

Originally posted by lostdave
More Lyrics Is the Primary thing I am hearing here???Is that the Gist???
More verbal rhythm.... whether it be through more words, more layers, Something.... (I read from you that you're keeping the funk!) In A section Verbal rhythm is very slow - instrumental is cookin'.... if that's what you want it needs to be contrasted/balanced out somewhere else - or it just feels slow paced


OK.....it used to go B A then we axed a verse....the song was getting too damn long..MY attention was starting to wander!!!
Understandable.... IF you go BAB after the solo - maybe layer the guitar and vocalist right through the coda.... fade out singer. (Then again, your attention won't wander if you beef up verbal rhythm ;)) If you stick to B's Make it BB instead of BBB in the vocal line?

New idea here..... make vocal line in A section call and response with guitar?? I know, I know.... more solo work! 6 beats after each vocal phrase..... pick up on the and of 4 after vocal line and fill for 1 measure to the downbeat of measure where vocal line comes in....


as for the loss of Repeat guitar solo.....welll...........I can only have so many Ideas Per song..I have to quota them out or they start sounding the same ;) at least to my ears...

Okay - keep it simple..... hit a Bflat around 1:27 and slide to a G around 1:31ish before singer comes in ;) effects will make it even juicier

I still would like to see a copy of the lyrics.... even if you DON'T listen to them, you being testosterone driven and all ;)

[lostdave]

I shall dig 'em up and zap them over to you ;)

Dave

[jeaniesing]

thanks...... and I'm doubting my "new idea" from above.... too much guitar now that I listen with the extra guitar parts running in my head..... but You're the master ;)

[jeaniesing]

Okay, I'm un-doubting the call and response idea..... It could be the answer to maintaining the integrity of what you have... Had it in my head for the past 2 days Thank You! (one of the hazards of my profession....)

[lostdave]

LOL....well I am glad I have amde you think...now how many copies of the EP would you like to buy once it is pressed :D :D

[jeaniesing]

Originally posted by lostdave
LOL....well I am glad I have made you think...

Hmmmm - I'll have to THINK about that dear ;)

[ZelRiptha]

What's that burning smell?

;)

[lostdave]

I will throw together a mix with that tonite..
+ a special one that I have been working on ;)


Dave

[lostdave]

jeanie,
Think of them as Potential Xmas Gifts :thumbsup:

Dave

[ZelRiptha]

Hey, Dave! Whatever happened to this tune? It's a good 'un...